Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
