Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
