Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
