maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
