i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
