But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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