Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Pooping to opera.
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