they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Randomize
