Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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