and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
