You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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