A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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