Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
