is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
