she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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