he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
