After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
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