direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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