a queef is a wish your heart makes.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
