How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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