What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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