yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
