You don't have asthma, your pregnant
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
