8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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