i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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