I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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