thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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