Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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