I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize