gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
