if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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