he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Two words: blizzard sex
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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