Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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