I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
