Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
