She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
