Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
