'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
