We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
