i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
