He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
