I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
