No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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