I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
