this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
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