Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I bet he comes in French.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I need moral support for this bender
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Randomize
