I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
