I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize