If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
