Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
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